Crossing The Border

The bus turned to the bridge, smoothly crossed over  as the sea laid a view on the side. On the far sight was the big land, not just a land because a concept of nation has built a package of different system, society, a whole different world. That's why they say something about "new place new experience". Ahead was a country of Malaysia, and as the bus head on, I left Singapore behind.

The thing about crossing border by road-trip is the experience of duality by being physically close to both nation yet like a portal send you somewhere new, it is as if you're entering a new world. Now it might sound pretentious but let me illustrate with Agustinus Wibowo's experience written on his book. He was by the side border of Afghanistan and Turkmenistan, yet the sight of two zone of the same ground reveal the sight of a stretched one century apart civilization. Turkmenistan had cars passing by while in Afghanistan using donkey as transportation were still common. It is not about a century apart civilization I try to pick up, it is about the mind boggling ideas of two zone. So close in distance yet so far in concept, in none of unit of measure could tell.

Crossing border give that sorts of feeling. The warning road sign has changed the language, it tickled me with realization : different zone different language different behavior. welcome!

At first it was a delight to see hills, trees, such an endless green fields. But it literally became endless, when hour by hour passed by no sight of city could be seen. It was still green fields, palm trees, and billboard and it has been five hours. Even my nap duration could not keep up with it.

Another strange feeling was the first time you tap your feet to the ground, especially when it's your first trip to that country. As the bus started to move in slow motion I ran back to keep myself near so my phone could reach the bus wifi zone. Message was sent in a panic tap before the wifi too, left me. I said I have arrived and she could meet me on the agreed spot. The bus had ran off  caring about its business and left me alone in the strange land. It does not care it is your first solo trip, or how much tackling this means to you.

When you had no clue about your surrounding, or that's what your mind made it out to be, you got to  keep your face normal, keep it cool. Lucky our country had so much in common it was not so frightening. At first I talked to them in English but as days passed by I did not bother to because they got it in second when I spoke Bahasa.

This is Ramadhan month and most of people were fasting, it could have been a greater trip if I took some physical outdoor activity such as hiking up to the hills.. but being in Malaysia during Ramadhan offered its own perk, it gives so much glimpse of strong atmosphere Singapore was lacking of. By 6 pm we always wandered around Bazaar to buy some foods. It was not meant to be the main course but we always ended up getting full on starter dishes!! You just could not handle yourself to finally see two dollars worth a proper fulfilling meal when you've been in Singapore for too long! Mind you it is a bazaar and rows of booth showed food in your face, mocking your drool. We did not really plan things out but turned out it was different Bazaar we went to everyday. Sometimes it was Malay-Thai dominated, sometimes a little bit of Chinese too, and last day was Arabian foods!! It was hard to pick favorites, deep fried are easy to like.. But Tom Yam and Hainan Chicken Rice was on point, so was the kebab which costed only $2.4 for the huge size. Cooked by original Mid-eastern people, it did not have the loads of mayonnaise and cheese you would get in American food, but it definitely tasted just right and cultured. If that's the right word.

I like the sight of different cultures and race on the street. People speak Arabic, Indian, Chinese, Malay on street, mostly are like us, in search of food. Music played on the street sometimes it was dangdut. I love the street food culinary experience here.

I bought Indian dishes too! the colorful dish spread along the table, I expected them to be sweet. Out of the three kind I bought, my favorite is the milky white one and it smell and tasted like milk too. I wish I bought more to home... Not that Singapore won't have it but economically speaking.. well. Also it is quite hard to find there.

To that shout out to Anya, Ira my childhood friend and Mba Nindy, they had me gain all the appetite back the whole journey, and I could not thankful enough for their company and accommodation.

We went to Batu Cave too where temple and Hindu statues were placed side by side with nature. We went excited seeing crowds of birds. Rice were scattered all over the ground and my friend tried to collect the remains to later toss in the air and made a new small group of birds. Kids were running after birds. Suddenly all the birds made a motion toward a spot where family (at least what they seemed to be) took out a bag of rice and feed them.

After almost a week staying there and my budget has run out for food, I had to go back to Singapore. The bus had no wifi but oddly the journey felt shorter. The driver spoke out loud on phone and sang once in awhile like the world was his, my nap was cut now and then.

By the time the bus about to get on the bridge, the feeling emerged again. The buildings from far sight were the typical HDB in Singapore. As we cross the bridge, I went unexpectedly happy if I had tail it might wiggle. I was awestruck by the fact that I am happy to be back to... Singapore. I had subconsciously made it a second home regardless how much mediocrity my life had been there. The road sign was now in English and well.. more prohibition come along.

Malaysia from the distance

Singapore from the distance

Wants to Go to Art School? My Two Cents.

Maybe you would expect me to go against all the classic that say art is difficult! Don't go to art school, you will graduate unemployed! Do practical stuffs!

Well I still disagree with parents discouraging what their kids actually want for sole purpose of the job after. But been studying in arts college for two years, I would like to give my two cents.

College is structured LEARNING system. it means that whatever major you're taking, they will give you an intense learning broadly and deeply to equip you with what you have paid for. So when you get into an arts college, not just you will be given some time to practice in studio, but they will also provide knowledge on how art becomes what it is today, how other artist do their works, and how you have to broaden your option to make your arts.

I might disagree before when I was in high school but life got me a lesson, that college major should be a considerate decision. I won't say that the major you pick limit you from other area of practice, I don't think human's mind is that rigid unless you set it to. But it definitely makes a big deal for interesting learning you will go through for years. We are talking about years made of daily attendants listening or practicing something specialized for hours. 

I have heard many stories of people  stuck up in engineering or administration dreaming of studying arts. BUT being an arts student, oddly I have heard the same thing coming from the arts student. Not just once, but dozen probably! How could you regret learning about something so much close to your heart? so thought our naive. But yeah, my friend shared publicly how she regret taking design and wished she would stay taking medical school instead. I don't refer this just to fine arts. I have talked to students from illustration animation, graphic communication, and fashion. They have the same problem. But mostly I want to highlight fine arts because it is so called as the one with the least job field out of all.

When you think art school is just about beautiful drawing, then in my humble opinion I'd suggest you to take short course or workshop instead OR do dozens of research on arts school. Most of art school no matter how contemporary their genre is, has fundamental lesson for drawing yes. But rooting on structured based institutional learning they want to direct you into arts industry. It varies depending on which school you go, but I find it that it has become a condition for them in order to compete with other institution, that they have to equip the students to make it in a tough world out there. I am not saying that sole beautiful drawings are not arts, I think it is. The point is how much you are prepared to actually learning with an open mind, and not just boost your ego presenting your beautiful drawings. There will be lecturers asking you why you do what you do, why this and that. They could rip you off in front of people if they have to, you can't fool them bullshitting around, when you don't bring anything solid on the table. Institution no longer supports your art solely as hobby, it prepares it for the career as well.

It's going to make a long essay if I go deep on traditional arts vs contemporary arts which is on current trend so I'll skip to my next point. 

The power of words when it is said from heart is that it rings over and over again in your mind. I am reminded by what my lecturer said when he went mad looking how the students did not seem to have passion for learning for his class and always clueless about recent arts updates in Singapore. He was frustrated because in arts school you were supposed to be surrounded by passionate learners. He pointed out students randomly to answer "why do you make arts?" The air was tensed and most students answered unconvincingly. (maybe I would too, if that finger was at me)

That class drags up to this far, that now I bring it up again. Art is hard, make a living from art is hard, paying tuition is hard, why'd go all that trouble if we don't have a reason? It sinks in me the more and more it relates to my observation of arts industry recently.

It makes sense in a way how some people are put into a major where the job field are wide open under practical reason "easier to get a job" which is still naive in a way. But you can't have that reason  for arts. It's going to be hard. So I understand his frustration, if you are not eager to learn then what for?

I myself still try to find my place in arts. See? How could it be that tricky? It used to be just about drawing before I enroll, now it seems that I have to include some research on why I do what I do. Arts has a lot of genres and positions. Some people are good at making one, some are good at selling one, presenting one, writing about one, or teaching about one..

Some of non-arts people might just knew this but most artist have so much love and hate relationship with what we are doing. We are not forever on top of high spirits energy flowing through our hand making connection with universe through painting and all what shit.

If you just like to draw and that's it, think twice before going to arts school. (Or research which department suit better to your interest. Are you more of a designer or artist)

If you just like shopping clothes, think twice about majoring in fashion. (Actually, think dozen times)

If you just like watching anime, think twice about going to arts school. Not that the input of your anime reference won't be useful, but because it's gonna be tougher than binge-watching 10 episodes a day.

If you are a learner with open mind, I'd say go ahead. But remember taking it to that serious level of going to college, you'll encounter pressure of arts as professional practice not just as hobby. You'll be surrounded by people who do things like you if not better. Lecturer will treat your works not just as doodle in leisure time, but actual meaningful works that could be potentially invested or thrown to the bin. If there is no good reason to stay and learn, it is gonna eat up your passion. I mean if you want to keep it a hobby, you definitely can alongside with other things that is more practical and pays more. That is one healthy choice. You can also twist your mind trying to make it a hobby out of professional activity that you are doing. That is one level higher and well kid I'd be jealous for you are so much on the right track. But the point is.. know that any school won't be that simple, easy, and laid-back just because it has label arts in it. 

I have seen my classmate only came to school on the last two weeks, and I never saw him again. I've seen people giving up their attendance because art has never been their interest in the first place. They were not good at any other subjects, art became the only option. I think it is fine to come with zero skill, as long you have that energy balls to learn forward. Talking about skill, art does not always include about skill anyway, nowadays. (that will make a whole new essay so skip forward)

College is tough like anything else. I have to admit the major I am taking now is the least tough out of all other, BUT everything comes with a price. For my major, it is going to be hard once we graduate if we don't prepare what it takes, or AT LEAST love what we do. So it is the same, there is an extra preparation.

As much as I have no control over the effect, I hope my writing is taken more as an insight of arts school and industry for a more considerate input rather than a discouragement. Like what I have said earlier, I support everyone who follow up their passion. and I understand passion changes, that's part of the process too. My friend wants to be politician after two years study in fashion and I support it I saw how much she light up when talking about one. My point is, school takes time and money,  and ALL major comes with good and bad but does it worth the glitters? Knows the difference of what we like or what we are prepared for AND what is only romanticized.

Series : Last One Second and Half

One of the good thing about series is that you are allowed to expand your ideas into many direction, under one theme. Or you could say in writing case, it elaborates your argument. 

On this series, I wanted to explore on raw looking faces, a moment before passing out. I have interest in consciousness, which you might have sensed in a lot of my works. I often think of the last few seconds before one is passing out. Their pale looking skin, eyes shut, or swollen, bluish bruises. Consciousness (maybe) on the stage of in between. That was the idea behind this series.

The color tone was something quite new too, since I don't really put pink on my painting unless the red accidentally smudged over the white. Back then it was one top color I hated the most. Weird it does not seem to matter the older I get.

I use acrylic and I am not that type of artist who likes the trouble of pushing many colors out of tubes and leave it dry unused (acrylic mocks you from the distance) so I always make the palette to minimum colour variants, unless I want to go crazy with fast stroke abstracts. In this series I use three dominant colours, and one extra alternatively.

What I have noticed about painting in series is that out of cohesive characteristics naturally or deliberately performed, you still see slight changes. It is interesting because in my case those changes seems to be caused by a change of interest, mood, and sometimes, paintings I have recently seen quite intensely. Human constantly change their stage of mind and often I found it hard to re-perform a painting with a level of concentration as intense as the previous one. That's why I got to more understanding when they say every piece is unique, not just in terms of visual but also the energy performed in every piece of it. Some artist could set up their level of focus consistently, but I believe there is always change. That is just how unique layers of human's experience is! 

This series were done in relatively short period of times. I have reversed psychology best works at me that if I loosen up a little and rely on a step at a time action, I tend to finish more than when my mind militarily command to not procrastinate.

Here are pictures of my paintings.

They are going to be exhibited on ARTas 2017 Singapore, along with my short animation. The exhibition picks " Changes / Flux" for its theme this year, and they see my works quite fitting! Heads up to their account here : https://www.instagram.com/artas2017/.